Probably the nicest compliment someone paid my relationship with G, which is just coming up on it's 3rd anniversary (I know, I know, we're romance babies comparatively) is that they wanted a relationship like mine - where someone drives you crazy but you still love them.
I guess that's kind of the theme of P!nk's song, "True Love". Life was simpler before "Blurred Lines", when I could just listen to a song, enjoy the beat, and let it get stuck in my head, but now I listen carefully to the lyrics and choose to vote with my ears, turning the station if the song supports something I don't agree with.
The first time I heard this song, I was driving. I listened, smiled a little as I identified with "Sometimes I wanna slap you in your whole face..", and "At the same time, I wanna hug you / I wanna wrap my hands around your neck..". Okay, fair. I think that anyone who is in a long term relationship with a partner who has a mind of their own has these thoughts from time to time.
The problematic part of this is "And you make me so mad I ask myself / Why I'm still here, or where could I go / You're the only love I've ever known..".
I would be the first to tell you that G and I have had issues understanding one another by times, and particularly when you add to it that we come from different backgrounds and also both pride ourselves on our ... (ahem, what's the nice word for 'pigheadedness'? oh yes..) resolve. But never once have I thought "Why am I still here? Oh, I have nowhere else to go." - I think it's fair to say that adults understand that when you start to have a thought like this, it is high time to GTFO and don't look back. As a reasonable adult listening to this song, I can smile and skip over the way that most young girls can interpret this part of the lyrics.
No lie, there are young girls out there who think that fighting means you're working it out and you're a grown up because of it. I don't disagree that working it out means love, but here's a handy guide:
If your fights are about situational things, that you can both change and borne of frustration - ie. money, living with your mother-in-law, money, and oh, money - working out these issues and finding a solution, like picking up a second job so you have more money and can move out of your mother-in-law's place, you're good!
If your fights are about fundamental things like how his family that he is very close to is suffocating, you don't like the hobbies that she had before you got together, she is too jealous, etc - it might not be a bad idea to GTFO and find someone who has a looser relationship with their family and is into polygamy (okay, I know that's a stretch).
If your fights are about fundamental things like how his family that he is very close to is suffocating, you don't like the hobbies that she had before you got together, she is too jealous, etc - it might not be a bad idea to GTFO and find someone who has a looser relationship with their family and is into polygamy (okay, I know that's a stretch).
And above and beyond all of this, if one person is constantly compromising... well, it's obviously not them that is the problem...
I just worry that because a pop star said it, many girls are going to stay in relationships that are unhealthy and damaging and quite frankly, scary because 'But I hate you, I really hate you, /
So much, I think it must be / True love... No one else can break my heart like you..'.
Life was so much easier before I had to start changing the station when "Blurred Lines" came on.
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